Thursday November 16, 2023 The dark season has been harder for me than usual this year. I struggle with keeping it real here and being positive and upbeat. So today I’ll share a little of each. I still miss the animals horribly and might erupt into tears at the littlest thing. But I believe my grieving is relative to the amount of love I had for them over the past 25 years. It’s still hard to look at the empty pastures and barns. Happy retirement? I wish. But when you love hard, you will eventually be hurt just as hard. And I wouldn’t have changed a thing about sharing my life with all the wonderful animals I knew over the past years.
However I truly am grateful that we were able to keep them all together in a great new home. I am grateful that we will not have to struggle with keeping this place working in the high altitude snow we’ll have this winter. I’m grateful that I can still see them all on Facebook if I choose to! I’m grateful to be able to see Farmer Ed rest a little bit. I have always looked for 3 good things each day, it’s what we talk about during “Happy Hour”. But lately I’ve made myself list 10 good things each evening before I close my eyes in sleep. And of course I can because I really have so much to be grateful for. Including a new grandbaby due in April! But keeping it real doesn’t mean I pretend not to hurt. There is a balance I’m striving for and I’m getting there.
I’m almost finished with the 2023 fleeces and getting them ready for processing. I said to Ed the other day “I’m not sure what my new passion is, but it is NOT skirting fleeces!” Picking out hairy bits and pieces of hay does not spark the creative mind! But the resulting yarn will be lovely to spin because I do it. And that will be enjoyable.
We’re getting things ready to host a family Thanksgiving and it will be good to have the kids around.
Take care of yourselves and thanks for checking in.
Photo of the day: We did say “no dogs on the furniture” at one point. Ha, that lasted for about a day. These 2 fluff butts keep me grateful too. Even with all the darkness. 
Sunny Bryson
Happy Thanksgiving Amiga. I am grateful for your inspiring posts.
Linda
Thanks Sunny. I’m grateful for you!
Gigi Caito
I have always thought you have a book in you, Linda. I loved reading your wonderful and positive Blue Moon Ranch updates and I now cherish each one you share all the more. Thank you and Happy Thanksgiving with your family. And what will the Gentle Boy do when he visits???
Linda
The gentle boy still loves to be here and seems to keep busy as usual. The last time he was here he stacked firewood with Farmer Ed and got the new “cat house” all ready for the the barn cats this winter. He also loves to take the dogs for a walk, read and look for fish in the creek.
Funny you mentioned the book idea, it has been swirling around in my head. 😁 Another friend also made that suggestion.
Gigi Caito
I’ll take an autographed copy!
Linda
You got it!! Thanks for the big smile Gigi!
Caryl Frink
This has nothing to do with the ache in your heart. But it seems to me to be a good time to thank you for one post I remember where you mentioned historian Heather Cox Richardson. I followed the link you posted and have continued to follow this sane voice in what often seem to be insane times. So, maybe it does have to do with the ache in your heart, because you care so much about this world. Thank you.
Linda
Thanks Caryl. Heather Cox Richardson helps keep me sane too. But you’re right, it hurts to read the news these days and it does contribute to my aching heart.
Lana
I’m sorry for your sadness. I know, if it were me, it would be very difficult to look at the empty barns and pastures. But being grateful is a great way to lift the spirits. And you do have such beauty around you. I actually wanted to cry when I saw one of your pictures showing the fencing and pastures. Change is hard and it doesn’t help that it is dark so soon every day. I’m with you on skirting fleeces. Because our herd is so old, we only keep the blankets, and they are the easiest to skirt. And more of it goes to the Pool, which isn’t as picky as the yarn spinning mill. Heather Cox Richardson is a treasure for sure. I learn so much history from her and I’m so happy she reaches so many people. There’s hope out there!! Keep the faith. I think of you often and I know I’d have a very hard time making the decision you made. Hugs.
Lana
Linda
Thanks Lana. I know you understand. I think I am also having an identity crisis. Who am I now? I used to be the lady with all the alpacas. Now I’m just not sure. I’m trying to be patient with myself. Not easy.
If we could just get more people to read HCR, we’d be so much better off as a country!
Lana
I understand about the identity. I’m trying to get myself to retire from breeding Ragdolls, but being the cat lady and having kittens around is part of my identity that is hard to give up after 22 years. Two more litters at most and I’ll have to face it…
Rae Reed
Bless…so difficult …good decisions usually are.. thank you for your honesty and yes…the early dark and cold of these days is hard to ignore. Congratulations on the grandbaby and wish you a very blessed thanksgiving…
Linda
Thank you Rae.